...

shocking end of the old shit

Posted: Tuesday 30 December 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: 0 comments




came across this nolita-add in le. what a mess.

so let the new shit begin.

Posted: Sunday 14 December 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: 0 comments

have worked a great deal on installation for margins for which we also have the programm scheduled now and you can see that here. my work "sui_site or how to disappear completely" will be shown as a video loop with performative side shows in a durational installation.

a still:

what a difference a day makes

Posted: Thursday 11 December 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: , 0 comments

check out this durational 24h performance of self improvement, they're sweet :)

5 people, 1 room, 24 hours. How much can be done in one day? What have you always wanted to do but never had the time? We decided to find out. We are Beta Test; John Hunter, Simon Cummin, Cat Harrison, Iván González and Max Olesker. We started out with a length of time, 24 hours, and looked at ways of filling it. We were fascinated by this duration we'd allocated entirely to ourselves; a period with which to do whatever we wished. So. Conversations bubbled with excitement, and the ideas flowed freely. 24 hours seemed like a long time; long enough to achieve something. The question then became what could be achieved and, crucially, what did we want to achieve at the end of our day? Everything, it seemed – from a neo-renaissance tromp l'oeil relief, to a wall-sized mosaic, to a five-part harmony. Madness.

exactly

Posted: Monday 8 December 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: , 0 comments



find myself agreeing with deviant kgullholmen.

but like things, too. i.e. my internship. and this gadget that makes my pics go *weeeeee* ...

quiet and slow and not

Posted: Monday 17 November 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: , , 4 comments

imagine a quiet and slow place. a quiet and slow time. a surrounding of quietness and slowness and all that twice within two days. have i met my personal paradise? or is it rather only the hope of having found it that makes me all romantic and blind for its loud and fast paces that undoubtedly must have been there as well.

well, i went to two performances and liked them.

first was heiner goebbels' i went to the house but did not enter shown during spielzeit europa in haus der berliner festspiele. he directed this scenic concert performance/installation which he also composed the music for. said music was sung by the hilliard ensemble and was brilliant. the sung texts were eliot's love song of j. alfred prufrock, blanchot's madness of the day, kafka's im gebirge and beckett's worstwards ho. the whole performance very much used a filmic setting in a sense of space and maybe depth of perspective. there were always the outsides which the people (the four singers) referred to by example singing out of the window, but those outsides were not really seen. so it sort of felt very hermetic. the texts, too, are maybe not the most open texts themselves. but instead of using this spatial and textual hermetics to sort of 'show'
something to the audience it rather felt as if it was displayed in a panorama of associations that were not forced upon us. the only thing i felt forced by was the head of that woman in front of me who was very eagerly following every tiny action and movement on stage by moving her head and upper body constantly which is a great joy for the person sitting behind in haus der berliner festspiele, i can assure you. the sounds have been amplified incredibly good so that every quietest tone could be heard - the rustling of wrapping paper, the folding of tablecloths, their breathing. it looked sort of flat but was deeply audible.


left sort of satisfied and sad. satisfied because i really enjoyed the brilliant music and performance with its quietness and slowness. sad because the texts seemed to stir something in me and that, i thought, was sad because it was sad texts by 'old men' and on stage were only 'old men' and heiner goebbels may also be an 'old man' ... but then, i learned afterwards that prufrock for instance was written by eliot aged 23. don't know it sort of made me even sadder.

from the love song of j. alfred prufrock by eliot:

No! I am not Prince Hamlet, nor was meant to be;
Am an attendant lord, one that will do
To swell a progress, start a scene or two,
Advise the prince; no doubt, an easy tool,
Deferential, glad to be of use;
Politic, cautious, and meticulous;
Full of high sentence, but a bit obtuse;
At times, indeed, almost ridiculous -
Almost, at times, the Fool.

I grow old ... I grow old ...

from the madness of the day by maurice blanchot:

I am not learned; I am not ignorant. I have known joys. That is saying too little: I am alive, and this life gives me the greatest pleasure. And what about death? When I die (perhaps any minute now), I will feel immense pleasure. I am not talking about the foretaste of death, which is stale and often disagreeable. Suffering dulls the senses. But this is the remarkable truth, and I am sure of it: I experience boundless pleasure in living, and I will take boundless satisfaction in dying.

I have wandered: I have gone from place to place. I have stayed in one place, lived in a single room. I have been poor, then richer, then poorer than many people. As a child I had great passions, and everything I wanted was given to me. My childhood has disappeared, my youth his behind me. It doesn't matter. I am happy about what has been. I am pleased by what is, and what is to come suits me well enough.

Is my life better than other peoples lives? Perhaps. I have a roof over my head and many do not. I do not have leprosy, I am not blind, I see the world—what extraordinary happiness! I see this day, and outside it there is nothing. Who could take that away from me? And when this day fades, I will fade along with it—a thought, a certainty, that enraptures me.

I have loved people. I have lost them. I went mad when that blow struck me, because it is hell. But there was no witness to my madness, my frenzy was not evident: only my innermost being was mad. Sometimes I became enraged. People would say to me, Why are you so calm? But I was scorched from head to foot; at night I would run through the streets and howl; during the day I would work calmly.


second was maybe forever by meg stuart and philipp gehmacher (who both danced) shown in volksbühne theatre with fantastic music by niko hafkenscheid whose music was sweet and melancholic (sort of reminded me of vincent gallo) and sad and sorrowful but never failed to grab you, and the two dancers, with its progressing ever so slightly promising rhythm (waltzes, mainly). the set design here was also very flat, a half circle marked by dark green curtains which were, towards the end, opened a little. in the center there was a big picture of a dandelion clock, halfway blown away, that was sometimes in a sepia shade, sometimes almost colourful and bright and shiny. the dancers were sort of repetitive in their movements and the music, repetitive, too. but then those subtle changes, a hand here a minor chord there. shifting from something you think you recognize to something that seems very strange to you back to something you feel sure is directly performed for you. the strange thing was, you felt lulled and lured into it and only at points could realize the subtle shifts. then those came as a big surprise. (which now, as i write this reminds me of a thought i had on the sublime and subliminal. etymologically somehow connected, it seems contradictory and paradox to think of the sublime as something you would only be aware of subliminally. but then again, maybe it's those surprises you're facing with incredibility, those that found their way subliminally into your sub_conscience. once you focus (again and maybe consciously), they're there and struck you as incredible, maybe even sublime.)



one for/ces all

Posted: Saturday 15 November 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: 0 comments




it seems a little unreasonable to me but proves that one can petrify a system. cute in a way. outrageous as well.

in short: lutz heilmann, former member of former gdr ministerium für staatssicherheit, now member of die linke leftwing party and member of deutscher bundestag has decided that this article as being linked to by german www.wikipedia.de is not exactly to his liking. and has forced www.wikipedia.de to shut down their site.

today at hamburger bahnhof

Posted: Saturday 8 November 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: , 0 comments

kult des künstlers:

(ayse erkmen)

(?)

(sarah lucas)

(rodney graham)

(not really beuys)

nay, seriously, what a coincidence

Posted: Tuesday 4 November 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: , 0 comments



mueck's big man with nico's janitor of lunacy. hah, and that song is covered by soap&skin as well.

Janitor of lunacy
Paralyze my infancy
Petrify the empty cradle
Bring hope to them and me

Janitor of tyranny
Testify my vanity
Mortalize my memory
Deceive the Devil's deed

Tolerate my jealousy
Recognize the desperate need

Janitor of lunacy
Identify my destiny
Revive the living dream
Forgive their begging scream

Seal the giving of their seed
Disease the breathing grief

mueck(e(t))baudrillard or i just wanna be the cigarette

Posted: Monday 3 November 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: , , 1 comments


i wish i was them sometimes. today for instance. they're actually really small. and they're not alone.


or why not her? mueck paid huge attention to her. that's good, isn't it?

"Alles trägt zum Versagen des Systems bei, das sich unfehlbar gibt. Und angesichts dessen, was wir im Rahmen seiner rationellen und programmgestützten Herrschaft bereits erleben, kann man sich fragen, ob nicht die Unfehlbarkeit des Systems selbst vielleicht die schlimmste Katastrophe wäre" said monsieur baudrillard in le monde diplomatique. and also in the perfect crime: "The absolute rule is to give back more than you were given. Never less, always more. The absolute rule of thought is to give back the world as it was given to us — unintelligible. And, if possible, to render it a little more unintelligible."

or maybe i just wanna be the cigarette in luca's hand


oh, and here are parts of angstbörse, one really interesting, very interactive work on our fears by performance collective dramazone as shown in the akademie für angewandtes leben, hotel subbotnik: .

différance

Posted: Sunday 2 November 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: 0 comments

the house is with blurry dots of colour and all the haze may just have been change of gestalt.



thank-you-sillyness

Posted: Friday 31 October 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: , 0 comments

dear bachelorette-commenters. that is for your sake. i am now relieved and graded. major thank you to all of you who commented on- and offline and really helped :) i owe you!



besides that - excitement and cold

when i was a child i bred a whore in my heart - pt.2

Posted: Monday 27 October 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: 1 comments

soap&skin at sophiensaele: in fact it was at this exact line she stopped and then restarted singing because i don't know, she seemed to have forgotten the lyrics or elsewhat.

When I was a child
I bred a whore in my heart
a stillborn child
I've gasp for ..
the devil into my spiracle

I was a child, I was a child
I am a child


impression: sad and fragile and shy and morbid and adorable.

i was half way between not wanting to clap at all and clapping frantically. really beautiful, especially "spiracle" and "janitor of lunacy". it seemed like such a rare gift, very translucent and etheral in a way, as if she herself was the constant reminder of her own death. so sad, seriously, touching and just unbearably sad, because i would not dare, like let's say go and cuddle her, but it's rather that feeling of not being able to move because you fear you will destroy everything.

she seemed very withdrawn and lost like a somebody who struggles and runs through walls and walls and doesn't realize that they're bleeding like mad.



reminded me of patrick wolf, strangely enough, of múm, of yann tiersen, a little björk, coco rosie (especially when she fumbled around with her laptop for some eerie electro sounds), well and, seriously, there was some nico.

when i was a child i bred a whore in my heart

Posted: Tuesday 21 October 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: 0 comments



so looking forward to seeing her next monday in sophiensaele ...

today today

Posted: | Posted by k | Labels: , , , 4 comments

yes, today is the day i will quit smoking again :) so, pretty please, pressure from all sides ... bear/bare with me should i find it unbearably hard and fail (oh, that is naughty, maybe i should fail). well, i'll have sweetie darling to smoke for me, looking quite a lot more exciting doing it than i ever could anyways ...


as for the many other overwhelmingly exciting things happening, it's too many of them, i can't tell.

my washing powder got stuck in the slot. if that is interesting.

i was on the phone with one lady right now who told me i am supposed to have technicians around today, although that was never scheduled. how lovely. they're doing the buzzer.

saw striptease with nico. she was gorgeous and serge did a wonderful soundtrack to it. a. was all melting next to me and is now about to learn how she moves for that one dance at the end ...

since i recorded the ghosts of the reading i did with the last books here are the latest:
the world according to garp oh, i liked it, i guess. although it has this wooden quality of language a lot of times and seemed very 'easy'. interesting for me whom i love to pick quotes or underline things for later reference, i was only at rare points able to do that with garp. i rather think it is a certain atmosphere transported or story told, in simplicity and with no big fondling around with language, which i realize, is also just another way of using language, and it definitely fit. so maybe actually i am not really thrilled. but at least, after two trials on the irving-front i finished one and hadn't stopped reading after 50 pages. well well.
and i did something very enjoyable which was getting anne of green gables, thanks to j., and hach, isn't it just lovely to see such a melodramatic, tragic child? i love it and started the second novel ... reminds me ever so much of nesthäkchen and trotzkopf and makes me wonder whether i should not be a little too old for it ... well, but there is the arden hamelt waiting on my shelf and still some light reading aka proust which i think will be a splendid winter-read.
i also to the second third read in watermelon sugar by richard brautigan :)

wow, a lot.

i am also thrilled about the fact that i need to proofread texts and that there is material for seminars about to fill my head with fresh ideas.

re the filling. i added the literature part after 5 hours or so. i feel that my head wants to smoke. but i won't give in and allow myself 3 days of giving in to other temptations like chocolate. and i will go and have a walk. now that i missed the one seminar i am actually interested in because of waiting for the technician who, once here, only told me that it was a problem with the whole house and that there would be another date scheduled. grrrr.

when it doesn't need to be live unbuttoned

Posted: Tuesday 7 October 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: , , , 0 comments



sure gorgeous advertising :)

also: visit margins to find out more about our current call for papers on paradiesische zustände. we're looking for student presentations ranging from lectures to installation to art to whatever kind of format you're feeling comfortable with when you're presenting your thoughts on paradise or hell or things that spring to your mind when you hear paradise.

nothing much.

still exhausted.

my initials go fine with knackered fuckwit

Posted: Friday 3 October 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: , 0 comments




life is lovely.
and so ironic.
lovely.

i need another world - this one's nearly gone ...

Posted: Wednesday 1 October 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: 0 comments



i need another place / will there be peace? / i need another world / this one’s nearly gone / still have so many dreams ...



i must have seen too much skin / much more than i needed to win / and much more than i wanted to dream

post/prae-maximo-exhausted in berliny oooohtummy

Posted: Monday 29 September 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: , 0 comments

truth be told: i am exhausted. period.

handed in bachelorette paper today after meticulous printing, checking and binding. topped only by the fear that tomorrow's last chance of enrolment would be sheer horror which surprisingly enough isn't the case. so fingers crossed i am all new studenty darling wednesday.

my self-prescribed therapy of the week is spending at least 1 hour a day outside, preferably walking. yesterday and today i did just that and it's lovely. today i came across a tree at urbanhafen that looks like an art installation but i don't know. all sorts of things - clothes, bags, shoes, cups, bottles - hang there and it seems disturbingly forlorn. at one point i really should get myself a camera ...

ha! just killed a fruit fly!

and, found one falafel place that actually has superb falafel on sonnenallee, not those shabby thingys they try selling you everywhere for a ridiculously overpriced sum.

desktop looks almost clean again. yeah - get rid of the old work, because - yay - i need to write another paper.

but, on a lighter picture - am at the moment about to maybe find a concept for a new film and am very excited about that but i can't say more now. will also start drawing again when all this "vacation-business" is over and the new semester starts. re that - what courses i will actually attend i need to think about as well.

finished that book: and i loved it! the language!! wowowowow. and finished that: and that i actually found it quite the stunning experience was not to be expected. and i started that: and am intrigued by the first death ...

so, yes, pretty busy doing things that calm me down.

i basically took this post from the whoracle of delphi - miss vaginal davis

Posted: Thursday 25 September 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: , , 0 comments

sorry miss davis, but your latest post is just too nice to not be fully quoted here. how i love your blog!
my deepest adoration is with you and your insights :)


PRESQUE RIEN
The lure of the negresse is her adeptness at the sexual arts. She represents danger, a sexual passion capable of satiation and consumption, the literal siphoning off of life through the draining of precious seminal liquor.
Thats basically what my hot, enormously hung German lover told me recently. Well, not exactly in such poetic terms. His big white Nina Blanchard panties are all in a bunch because his wife and I get along better then i do with him.
His spouse is very worldly, and is not troubled in the least by my affair with her husband. They have two small children, and frankly she is only married to him because he gave her pretty babies, and is independently wealthy, so she lives a secure lifestyle. When i first met him i told him i could only be with him if his wife knew about us. He just wanted to carry on behind her back in a traditional melodramatic manner. He is only 28 years old, and i am 400 which makes me too old to be somebodies mistress. So i boldly marched up to his Mrs and told her everything, and without missing a beat, she gave me her blessings.
I am only interested in him because of that giant lug between his legs. The man genitals are beyond impressive. His personality is a bit stilted in that stereotypical teutonic fashion.
Lately he´s gotten all weirded out by the unconventional nature of the relationships. I keep telling him, "well lets end it then." He doesn´t want to do that either, as he´s now too wrapped up in the Doll, and her race horse arse. I think i have properly assmatized him.
With these European men you have to give them a little then pull back. It drives them gnuts. Enough about my love life, i can´t believe i´ve been this revealing.
***
A reader from Boston wrote congragulating my scoop on the relationship of movie ingenue Anne Hathaway(The Devil Wears Prada) and her no account playboy embezzler ex-beau Raffaello Fallieri. If you remember, i broke the story of their initial pairing here in this very blog. I also said that Mr. Fallieri was a crook and hornpiglet. I knew this firsthand from my own dealings with him sniffing at my gnarly hole years ago in New York. A few mainstream new sources actually gave me some credit for breaking the story which was nice and certainly unexpected.
***
I also predicted this international global financial crises back when i was still living in Los Angeles. My lady intuition is always spot on. I inherited my Daisy Gamble powers from my Louisiana born Creole mother.
Are you ready for some more beheading of the prophet? Well i am going to give it to you whether you want to hear it or not. Here goes: The US will plunge even deeper into a depression. Not like the one in the 1930s, this one will be different but equally devastating. The Republicans will win the presidency. McCain will die in office, and Ms. Palin will become the first fremale president. If by chance by prediction is in-correct, and Obama wins. Senator McCain will still kick the proverbial bucket and Mr. Obama will be assassinated six months into office.
As the Whoracle of Delphi i only bring misfortune telling.



well, now that i think about it. it's the second post in a row in which i was not the author. huch ...

i am all bad-car-maed these days and all blurry-minded and depersonalized, somehow.

but i am going to see the previewing rehearsal of sebastian baumgarten's 'requiem' at komische oper tomorrow which is good and to gossip a little: said baumgarten knicked his spouse kati angerer 'with her fat ass' off the stage because she refused to act properly or better according to his plan. maybe frank can help. well, but i like mozart's 'requiem' a lot so it's gonna be all melting in my chair. well, or the rest of it. dies irae.

re that - i got my admissions - BUT only after i've called them and they realized they've FORGOTTEN me!

thesis is 'done' since a couple of days and now runs meticulous re-re-re-reading by brave readers.

ah, not enough, that arte.tv's quiz 'which european playwright are you?' told me i was sarte, no, m. at tonight's get together at r.'s flat said that my new haircut makes me all existentialistttty. wow.



and! eventually got me some more chains for hanging the catharsis :)

we can so do it ...

Posted: Sunday 21 September 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: , 0 comments

found this on shtreimel's blog, lol. *i like*

wow: mozart. and wow: sunglasses

Posted: Tuesday 16 September 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: , 0 comments

two things i found worth sharing with you. as for the first, it bears some resemblance to bukkake, does it not?



and the second, well, i guess, i am flabbergasted. i mean. whoaaaa.......rgh. actually, i considered having this one as a splitscreened film running next to one of my videos. i didn't dare. i would so sink in the shadow of that ...



if enjoy is the appropriate term, i hope you enjoyed.

seasoning reason or "i love you. i want to have your abortion."

Posted: Monday 15 September 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: , , 2 comments

when i came back today from work i was having a little walk through reuterkiez and then sesamkiez and then my place of which i don't know any name. i came to realize, again, i might add, that both reuter and sesam are full of seasoning. and you might very well think it's a change of season why should there not be a seasoning in the air. you are so wrong. not air. no. floor. down on the streets there is loads of ripped little packings of seasoning for your very own ramen noodles dish. i wonder why and how that can be? i mean, obviously, we are not so much of a hyper-sophisticated city that allows citizens to boil water on the street, as of yet. how come there is seasoning packings all over? mistaking them for other packings or wrappings? nope. checked like 10 of them. all seasoning. so, maybe, there is a kind of art-project involved? i mean, how? i can understand crisps or gums packings, i can, but, seriously, seasoning for ramen noodles?!

well, i had my very own noodles today, they've been dipped in coconut-chili-ginger-peanut-etc.pp. and they've been yummy.

and what's wrong with the weather? thank god for lacan or i would have frozen my bollocks off although i am sitting here wrapped like an onion. reason tells me - turn the heat on - sod off, it's september, other part of reason replies.

well, been also cocooning myself with icelandic music, and if that is not warming i don't know what should be.

i've been watching quills and was a bit disappointed frankly speaking. well, but i don't like kate winslet anyhow, so that was to be expected.

read deleuze, too. and some more lovely žižek, so two quotes for tonight, whereas the first one (the parts in inverted commas) would actually be palahniuk, i presume:

„i love you. i want to have your abortion.“ this, and not the proverbial „i want to have your child“, is the ultimate expression of love: the gesture of sacrificing the offspring and thus asserting the love relationship as the absolute end-in-itself. (180)

when we are subjected to a power mechanism, this subjection is always and by definition sustained by some libidinal investment: the subjection itself generates a surplus-enjoyment of its own. this subjection is embodied in a network of „material“ bodily practices, and for this reason, we cannot get rid of our subjection through a merely intellectual reflection. our liberation has to be staged in some kind of bodily performance, and, furthermore, this performance has to be of an apparently „masochistic“ nature; it has to stage the painful process of hitting back at oneself. (183 f.)

(žižek: an ethical plea for lies and masochism. in: lacan and contemporary film, ed. mcgowan/kunkle)

so

Posted: Saturday 13 September 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: , 0 comments

i am very busy and important. and do write. and read. and! i did finish lost and i really loved it.

besides that many other things.

went to market on maybachufer the other day and liked that a lot. it's such a lively atmosphere and reminded me of the shuk in jerusalem.

additionally, i am thinking about a little trip to london later that year :) oh, i am such an addict. and to so many things. will it ever stop?

autumn's around the corner and it's going to be beautiful. all that decay.

well, i know, i better be off. so, take care.

ah, i figure i won't have too many of those videos left to do but i came to think that if maybe there are some burning questions or additions on your part, why don't you get in touch and we'll figure out how to deal with that. thank you anyways for the time you have spent helping me out and your thoughtful comments both on- and offline.

bachelorette vids - gender.leaves.me.unfocused

Posted: Thursday 11 September 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: 2 comments



on gender online.

bachelorette vids - real death and virtual death threats

Posted: Tuesday 9 September 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: 4 comments



how the "anonymous" feeling we have online has an influence on how we behave.

bachelorette vids - im-possible sending and receiving

Posted: | Posted by k | Labels: 0 comments



on sending and on receiving and on derrida.

bachelorette vids - codes and hats and watertowers

Posted: Monday 8 September 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: 5 comments



on codes. and with a hat and planes and watertowers and light patterns.

bachelorette vids - late night randomness

Posted: Friday 5 September 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: , , 0 comments



well, this is so going to be wholly different than the others :)

on random things like countryside love, swollen balls (that were not his: http://www.gayromeo.com/leatherchapsbln but two guesses on who that is. the one who says it first, gets a chance to be the one this paper is dedicated to (if you're sure, it will pretty much be a lot of fun for you to check out this: ... well, i can't really say it here. too naughty. hihi. but i am so very much in the mood to share, so send me a message. hint: ). for obvious reasons l. is not allowed to say it, sorry), musicals, and anonymous hair.
let's face it. all of it.

bachelorette vids - what one will later call the plan

Posted: Thursday 4 September 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: , , 4 comments



on the plan. and soldiers and winnie the pooh.

bachelorette vids - proust and karaoke

Posted: Wednesday 3 September 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: , 4 comments



on karaoke, proust, madeleine and how we only know so much. and about future topics.

thank you for your comments.

bachelorette vids - lipstick as strategy of mise-en-scene

Posted: Tuesday 2 September 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: 7 comments



on lipstick basically. and how one might use filmic strategies for one's videos.

thank you all for your comments.

bachelorette vids - immersion in serial virtual settings

Posted: Monday 1 September 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: , , 5 comments



on immersion in virtual realities, feedback, series, lost

i do very much appreciate feedback on this videos. part of the reason is in this video. the other is that i don't know how, yet, but i guess i maybe want to include some of it in my paper. so if you have the feeling that you can relate to one or another thing please leave a comment.

bachelorette vids - the flesh in global culture

Posted: | Posted by k | Labels: , 6 comments



i went and saw some dance performance in volksbühne (dave st. pierre - Un peu de tendresse bordel de merde!).
this is about how i felt when seeing the same body as somebody whom i know in canada in the flesh.

the body, virtual knowledge of people.

bachelorette vids - early on self-analysis

Posted: Thursday 28 August 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: 3 comments



on me touching my face, talking in english, my voice and many other relevant things.

bachelorette vids - mirrored identities

Posted: Wednesday 27 August 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: 2 comments



on mirrors, lacan, identity, chris crocker, degavabu, virtual knowledge of a person.

please let me know what you think.
pretty please.

bachelorette vids - virtual traces of thinking procedure

Posted: Tuesday 26 August 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: , 1 comments



on derrida, jean-luc nancy, chris crocker, traces, walking, kleist

bachelorette vids - waiting

Posted: | Posted by k | Labels: , , 2 comments



i decided to vlog while i am on writing my bachelorette paper. let's see how that goes. probably it gets more theoretically relevant than this one. but as i am writing on production and reception of identity on the internet it must be relevant already.

great.

new pics

Posted: Thursday 21 August 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: , , 0 comments

just wanted to let you know that my latest work can be seen here
and this is how i can look, too.

wholly excited about the circus in me

Posted: Wednesday 20 August 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: 0 comments

wow - as you may hear, there is music now.
found out how to do that while browsing the web for work and finding too many inappropriate things. how can i neglect the fact that the photographers i know of only do naughty pieces?

extraordinary good mood.
creativity brought with it one whole new song. wow.
very much am looking forward to rehearsal tomorrow.
weekend brought with it sore hand, throat and chin.

see the people sitting over there. i want to kiss and touch them everywhere. not because i really care. no, i wouldn't dare.
but still.

feeling good, but i already mentioned that,
did in fact also read for bachelorette-paper. very good.

had too much wine.

is it not phantastic that one letter can be put in the back of your mind just because of another one? but s says i shouldn't think of being healed.

wow - what a very interesting post :)

antony

Posted: Friday 8 August 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: , , , 0 comments

how i love antony and the johnsons. when i used to have a music section on the right they've been the only ones. does that qualify for a whole section? i wasn't sure. but just right now it's lovely, echoes through the flat from kitchen to here. have i mentioned that i love my blue?
ikea was funny enough yesterday, i payed 88,88 EUR and thought that very precise shopping. well.

and i picked up writing the paper on hydra's traces when in fact i should write my bachelor thesis. at the moment it's hard enough to concentrate (heat anyone? please, why was there no rain yesterday? bet it's going to rain tomorrow night, though, why not, wet marwell is as sexy as dry. haha. come to ladyfest and hear us play), and for i don't know, getting in the mood to write i read derrida and it helps. and i will get the second part of die postkarte later that week. i am thrilled. it's beautiful. it must be, right, because if it is the only thing i find the will and love to deal with at the moment it must be very special. wouldn't it be great to receive such notes, such exchange with somebody like him. sometimes i am just so umpf to not be a little older or young in another time.
speaking of that (haha) the dying animal is going to be made a movie, i didn't know that. ben kingsley and penelope cruz. wow. well, let's see. i liked the book so much, it could be hard.

one very positive aspect of living here now is that i learn a lot of swear words. it's great. a whole new package of communicational skills. maybe t.'s proposition to d. to have anti-violent-communication-courses could come in handy. but it's good. it's another way, but i can understand why the people of ernst busch decided on placing the ivy-toweresque arty lovebees in that industrial, working zone. or not? well, in a way everything is okay.

takes 30-40 minutes by bike to uni. that's good news. did that  yesterday (bright as always, to pick the hottest day).

imagine that - i have got tickets to four shows of tanz im august.

how i feel (not)

Posted: Wednesday 6 August 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: , 0 comments


by slava mogutin

by know hope

déja vus

Posted: Monday 4 August 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: 0 comments

i am in a very bad mood. very bad.

fuck powerpoint. like really very much the way it hates to be fucked. and then multiply your fucking efforts by thousand. fuck again. see if it whines. if it does, again. only not if powerpoint has a masochistic tendency. then just leave it rotting away with its need to be fucked really hard and eat icescream or make love with keynote.

okay, good.

well, fuck the thickness of chains.

fuck bad mooded people.

fuck pigeons.

fuck minions who seemingly left one electronic device on while going away that beeps every five seconds. then realize this minion is yourself and find that your fucking phone searches its base which it can't have because it's not connected to the fucking landline.

very bad.

told you so.

wow

Posted: Friday 1 August 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: , 0 comments

i discovered the yiddish slang for blowjob which is "metzitza bapey" here.

it finally rains. finally.

painted white walls white today. no white is the same as any other white. it's tight white right. how do i come to think of reza abdoh now? well, anyways.

first day of being busy for bachelor officially passes in 45 minutes. i have watched some more videos which counts as preparation, fortunately :)

only two boxes left to unpack. i have a very organized flat, happy me.

and e. today has spoken to me on the phone and said "hallo grissieh" which is very good considering that he is only 4 days old. i am so proud of l. and j. and happy for them i could cry.

the other things i did are very exciting, too, but that is understandable, i moved to a "hip" place - have wireless internet now! have hoped for rain all day long! have started working on a powerpoint presentation that i got to do for university and guess what, it's about my new flat...! have taken down the organic rubbish! have unpacked cds!

very good indeed.

e. is there

Posted: Wednesday 30 July 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: , , , 0 comments

he's there! he's there! little e. has joined the world yesterday morning at five o'clock. all my love to l. and j. and little e.

now, what i want to post is this by know hope. and that's it.




















some things are really almost ready.
and h. herz' voice reminds me of reni the voice. two posts back therefore gets an addition: imagine "h. herz und der trommler" with a michel chion like soundscape that reveberates like reni's. wow. and the drums' frum drumming from next door. which is no longer there. but there is still this huge pile of rubbish and old furniture in this courtyard and i wonder whether i should ask if it'd be okay to put mine which i, to absolutely shocking reactions from my neighbours placed on the street. now, i don't want to get fined, right.

went to bkk again yesterday and hereby officially declare it a very nice pub.

and i found that louise bourgeois said something very interesting on mirrors (on eyes and mirrors 1989-93 i presume): "reality changes with each new angle. mirrors can be seen as a vanity, but that is not at all their meaning. the act of looking into a mirror is really about having the courage it takes to look at yourself and really face yourself." (tate catalogue p.76). that goes very well in a direction i support.

now, am i going to make great big (w)holes of (literate) history, saying bookshelf holding, or not?

there

Posted: Tuesday 29 July 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: 0 comments

done.
now i am part of the west. haha.
it's going to be great.
i feel like lord of the flies.
but i am clean.
and i really do love the tea tree mint oil range of original source. mmh.
well, the heat. the heat. my brain is mashed.
but it is done.
i am here what was there.

boxes

Posted: Friday 25 July 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: , 0 comments

does anyone feel like their room is suddenly only 5 qm meters big and the rest are boxes? my favourite box so far is "theater, jacques, feine sachen" but i do like "bücher unten, pullover" as well. it probably wouldn't make sense to anybody besides me to read "bücher ganz neu außen" but i am very fond of my boxingsystem.
and, we rolled a washing machine over from neukölln arkaden to my place. now it's there. waiting for the dirty bits.
and - the blue!! oh, i like the blue.
and: da war einer, der räumte erst seinen keller aus und dann trank der bier, saß aufm sessel, redete mit sich selbst und sang inbrünstig mit irgendwie 70er jahre musik mit und trommelte auf töpfen und so. es war LAUT
und dann waren m. und ich drüben wegen einer sackkarre, die wir von oben gesehen haben und haben ihn gefragt, ob wir sie ausleihen können und der schickte uns dann zu THORSTEN, thorsten lugte dann mit gesamter hartzIV-familie sehr sehr nett, wirklich, aus seiner wohnungstür und sagte, hier habter die, und griff hinter die tür. dann sind wir zur tanke und haben versucht, luft drauf zu machen. ende vom lied war, ich habe eine waschmaschine ausm media markt rübergerollt und dann kam frau h. herz und meckerte mit dem ausm andern hof, der dann schrie, dass wir uns GEFÄLLIGST ZU FREUEN HÄTTEN, WENN ER MAL TROMMELT und frau h. herz besprühte weiter ihre stiefmütterchenbeete im schatten des hauses und des langneseschirms.
ich war eher so mit entgleitendem mund (lachen oder prusten oder oh gott) und hab es als ästhetische erfahrung verarbeitet und werde bestimmt was über die nachbarn mal arbeiten, am besten eine installation: H.HERZ UND DER TROMMLER

well well. there we go.

Posted: Tuesday 22 July 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: , , 0 comments

l and i have been doing this audio-walk-installation during the first time ever hörspielfest altzella . we made a lot of signs in the park and sent people equipped with an mp3-player and a little leaflet to spend some time walking. at those signs we encouraged them (before) to stop and pause the sound collage and to just listen what sounds they could hear without any artificial background at all (meaning our sound collage). anyways, there were also a lot of 'actions' they could do at those spots like yelling, singing, hugging a tree, writing down things they would never want to say or hear, finding such papers and reading them aloud. it was lovely to see how many people came back and listen to what they said about it. from "it was too much, i couldn't listen" to "it was relaxing" to "i felt like a blind person" to "it made me think" there was a wide range of opinion. we liked to be there and here you can walk'n'hear (well, maybe not the walking side of things, but still, ah, and don't be irritated, just wait)


unknown members of schwarzesnossen did a trip to the countryside:



i started moving :)

know hope

Posted: Thursday 17 July 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: , 0 comments

i guess we all have our likings right. our little favourites. our maybe obsessions if it is really very bad (or good).
well, streetart is something i know very little of but it fascinates me a lot and i do very much like it. some of the most interesting things i ever saw were maybe the stencils and pieces in israel, especially at the border in bethlehem.
banksy did a lot of stuff there. and know hope from whom the following was done in l.a. but who comes from israel has such a lovely style. the background of that piece shows the project face to face where one israeli and a palestine are both making funy faces and more or less clash their cultures' conflicts, maybe.



the profile this is limbo at flickr shows a wide selection of know hope's work.

face 2 face:



banksy is so well reputed that his works sometimes are actually carved out of their quite well chosen places and are hung into galleries.



well, enjoy :)

again

Posted: Tuesday 15 July 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: 0 comments

the inevitable sadness

of fences

Posted: | Posted by k | Labels: , , 0 comments



this book is just really very good. i can't say more because: "The story of The Boy in the Striped Pajamas is very difficult to describe. Usually we give some clues about the book on the jacket, but in this case we think that would spil the reading of the book. We think it is important that you start to read without knowing what it is about.
If you do start to read this book, you will go on a journey with a nine-year0old boy called Bruno. (Though this isn’t a book for nine-year-olds.) And sooner or later you will arrive with Bruno at a fence.
Fences like this exist all over the world. We hope you never have to encounter such a fence."

....

i came back sunday night and felt a little tired, whereas little is quite the stretchable term, isn't it.

this week's course on powerpoint started and i feel like stfu...

nottingham ... i survived halo. great. i've been to derbyshire. matlock. heights of abraham. muddy. quite the oily fish'n'chips.

lions after slumber: "my demands 'n' my angels 'n' my waiting 'n' my distance. my death, my curtness, my insulin, my memory." who(')re scritti politti anyway, to me at least?

the person who wanted to move in, quite amiably cancelled and i am seriously pissed. but we'll have some people here this afternoon when i in fact should be in the other flat, maybe a little more painting.

i also read this book loose girl by kerry cohen and it made me very sad at points because maybe on some level i could very nicely relate to the stuff.

now, there is rushdie waiting now and i guess i better start reading serious things for my bachelorette-paper, too.

there you go, nothing too exciting.

so there was terminator

Posted: Friday 11 July 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: , , , , 0 comments

it has ended, the formal part at least. we're going to have curry later on.
so, every group this afternoon presented their work which either dealt with terminator (us), the wizard of oz or battleship potemkin. we had the idea, as posted before, to kind of create a visual duetting screen that subtexted the whole thing sexually. so, we went to that fancy second hand shop (massive!) and bought 80s style clothes ... we then decided on shooting right there in a small gateway. it was quite funny, though nerveracking at times to cut in camera. our frames basically showed the lower body parts and in there we had wuite the sexual tension (or healing) going on. several quite remarkable movements within that scene of terminator we shot in a kind of music-video, very bright kind of way. it was too funny and i hope we'll get a recording of it. there was sexual healing sung by sarah connor (why does she has that name?!?) on top of it :)
our film was projected right under the projection of terminator.
i liked it a lot.
during the discussion afterwards i felt a little silly because what i really wanted to say, couldn't seriously be said without exposing me or the person i was speaking about.
let's just say that all in all it was an amazing group of people i met here. some of them i would not really want to work with again, but the majority just really puzzled me by their brilliance, humour and ideas. lovely.
there is this wonderful cemetry closeby, i think there will be one new schwarzesnossen vid quite soon featuring that.
as for the weekend. let's just say there was no time until now to really see a lot of what nottingham might still be having for ust, so maybe we will jsut explore a little. and i need to have some shopping done. i already bought mint and tea tree oil shower gel and was reminded of a and my lost brochure somewhere in bedfordshire. well, the times when things seemed possible ...
i like being here a lot.
will shower now although that might not be of importance to you. but i will and now you know.
luv frum tuna.

closer or further away?

Posted: | Posted by k | 0 comments



You let me violate you
You let me desecrate you
You let me penetrate you
You let me complicate you
(Help me...)
I broke apart my insides
(Help me...)
I've got no soul to sell
(Help me...)
The only thing that works for me
Help me get away from myself,

I wanna fuck you like an animal
I wanna feel you from the inside
I wanna fuck you like an animal
My whole existence is flawed
You get me closer to God

You can have my isolation
You can have the hate that it brings
You can have my absence of faith
You can have my everything

(Help me...)
You tear down my reason
(Help me...)
It's your sex I can smell
(Help me...)
You make me perfect
Help me become somebody else

I wanna fuck you like an animal
I wanna feel you from the inside
I wanna fuck you like an animal
My whole existence is flawed
You get me closer to God

Through every forest
Above the trees
Within my stomach
Scraped off my knees
I drink the honey, inside your hive...
You are the reason I stay alive...


....


i am in nottingham at the moment. that's right. and it is for a workshop. we are quite the international group and it's interesting seeing all those people interact so differently and place oneself within that context. nine inch nails came to my mind right after i have designed a corporate identity for mecklenburg-vorpommern. it's great. we've got a whole house for us and i'd love to move in here. it's lovely.

i also bought a single-use black and white camera and am loving it.

tomorrow we'll do a remake of "terminator" creating a kind of sexual subtext. maybe closer is the more appropriate way of doing so than having sexual healing? we'll see.

well then, i hope the bed bugs won't bite tonight.

this is me for sit-up-britain. searching for-tuna. maybe fortuna will show herself later on.

still waiting.

leaving. again.

Posted: Monday 7 July 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: , , , , 0 comments

i am just about to go to the airport where a plane will wait for me to east midlands. whoa, i was never there and it still feels like "finally, i am going back (home(?))". i'll be working with an international group in a workshop by performance collective gob squad and it'll be great!

well, preparing always makes me wanna scream. so i did, internally.

by the by, saturday we had this conference and eiszeit was taken very well and discussed quite interestingly. the forum itself was quite relaxed and there was a very nice exchange of opinions during and afterwards with the afterwards slightly less polite which i liked. well, not impolite, don't get me wrong, just probably a little more on the honest side of things and that is something you can always catch me with.

lg and i started recording for our interactive audio walk which can be heard during the hörspielfestival in klosterpark altzella, close to dresden the weekend of 19th/20th. to put it simple, people will walk with mp3players through the park, which is lovely by the way, and will hear sounds and do things which we propose them before on a piece of paper. like hugging trees and telling them their secrets. or leaving traces on the floor. or whispering a confession of love. we'll see. but there are really quite interesting intermedialities at ear- and eyesight, i presume.
well, i guess i should be going.

bought fantastic shoes today by the way, and a shirt, and a pair of trousers. as being sensationally priced and needed i could not seriously resist. well.

and - my room is rented, at last. great.

i had a horrible dream that ended with me fighting some very good looking person on a staircase about who would fall and be dead. i won.
nothing compared to the one dream lately where i couldn't help but experience a sexual encounter with one person who accidentally really is not unimportant these days. well, we need to dream, right.

ah, and i packed, right. but just for nottingham.

not for the new apartment. this whole move is going to be quite disastrous. too many things and too little i would like to get rid off.

whhhha, i am going nuts over that person from that dream. that second. and i can't help it. and it can't be helped.

partly read. levinas "die zeit und der andere".
"Dies gehört also zusammen: Freiheit des Ich und ihre Materialität. Die erste Freiheit, die davon herrührt, dass sich im anonymen Sein ein Seiendes erhebt, fordert als Preis: das Definitive des an sich selbst gefesselten Ich. Dieses Definitive des Seienden, das die Tragik der Einsamkeit ausmacht, ist die Materialität. Die Einsamkeit ist nicht deshalb tragisch, weil sie Entzug des anderen ist, sondern weil sie in die Gefangenschaft ihrer Identität eingeschlossen ist, weil sie Materie ist. Die Fesselung der Materie sprengen heißt, das Definitive der Hypstase sprengen. Heißt, in der Zeit sein. Die Einsamkeit ist eine Abwesenheit der Zeit. Die gegebene Zeit, die als sie selbst hypostasierte, erfahrene Zeit, die durchlaufende Zeit, durch die hinduch das Subjekt seine Identität trägt, ist eine Zeit, die unfähig ist, die Verbindung der Hypostase zu lösen." (31)

the dying animal

Posted: Friday 4 July 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: 0 comments






"what do i mean by ridiculous? what is ridiculousness? relinquishing one's freedom voluntarily - that is the definition of ridiculousness. if your freedom is taken from you by force, needless to say you're not ridiculous, except to the one who has forcibly taken it. but whoever gives his freedom away, whoever is dying to give it away, enters the realm of the ridiculous that brings the most famous of ionesco's plays to mind and is a source of comedy throughout literature. the one who is free may be mad, stupid, repellent, in misery just because he is free, but he is not ridiculous. he has a dimension as a being."

philip roth "the dying animal"

come and see the time_s

Posted: Sunday 29 June 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: , , 0 comments

would be too happy to see you there :)

suddenly there was this major flood and climbed my bodies

Posted: | Posted by k | Labels: , 1 comments








:)

spent some time painting walls. now it's grey(t).

will have learned in-design through following week and it will be a weak-long-process indeed.

my hand is not numb no more.

i saw the big tummy of the future mummy.

too hot for fluent speech.

untolerable

Posted: Wednesday 25 June 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: 0 comments

it's the semi-finals. my neighbourhood, i am sitting here, trying to think, catching the sounds from the downstairs pub that is frequented by nationalist people:


minute 22: they seriously are yelling "die deutschen sind wieder da" (the germans are back) and even worse ... the h-word that went with hitler is chanted.
bloody hell, where do i live ...

minute 37: "hurensohn" (son of a bitch) with the free kick for turkey.

minute 41: emo-löw dissapears for a little while.

minute 44: rolfes is back (after this cut was suturated): "so sehen sieger aus. la la la la la." (winners look like this)

halftime: barbecue and polonnaise supplemented by "SO gehn die DEUTSCHEN, die DEUTSCHEN, die gehn so" (this is how germans walk) and bangers.

minute 46: "deutschland, deutschland, deutschland ist die macht" (germany is the power/force/strength)

minute 50: "hurensohn hurensohn hu hu hu hurensohn"

minute 51: "deutschland deutschland über alles" (germany over everything)

"die leitungen aus basel sind unterbrochen. wir bitten um etwas geduld" (no picture on the screen) -> "deutschland! deutschland! deutschland!"
"ein deutscher musst du sein!" (you have to be a german)
"es gibt einen deutschen meister. deutschland! deutschland! ist die macht!" (there is a german master/champion)
still no picture on the screen. "bildausfall" (no picture) (how hilarious)
just sound.
yelling downstairs.
fireworks.
still no picture (time: 22:06)

picture is there again at 22:07 at least 3 minutes none.

minute 66: "steht auf, wenn ihr deutsche seid ... bleibt stehn, wenn ihr türken hasst." (stand up germans. stand when you hate turks. - can't see inside the pub. maybe they're still standing)

minute 71: bangers

minute 72: "hurensöhne" (sons of bitches) (very creative ...)

22:21 again no picture
"oh no " ... "deutschland, deutschland ist die macht"

22:22 picture

minute 78: second goal germany. bangers. fireworks. yells.
"wir deutschen sind wieder da" (we germans are back)

minute 81: can't understand what they're chanting

minute 84: marching lock-steps "so gehn die deutschen, die deutschen, die gehn so"

minute 85: second goal turkey "hurensohn hurensohn hu hu hu hurensohn"

minute 86: some person ran on the field.

minute 89: third goal germany. yells, fireworks
"deutschland deutschland deutschland"
"deutschland deutschland deutschland ist die macht"

minute 91: "steht auf, wenn ihr deutsche seid"
"hu hu hu hurensohn"

minute 93: fireworks, bangers.
"finale!" ...

"deutschland deutschland ist die macht"
"wir zeigen der welt, wer wir sind" (we show the world who we are)
"raus ihr säcke" "heil heil heil" (piss off assholes)
"deutschland deutschland ist die macht"

they form a circle: very calm and hooded: "so feiern die türken" (this is how the turks celebrate) and yelling, arms up "so feiern die deutschen" (this is how the germans celebrate)

polonnaise on the street to the other pub "so sehn sieger aus" fraternizing with other public viewing crowd (?) back: "so gehn die deutschen, die deutschen, die gehn so"

"ordentlich hintereinander" (walk orderly) through the megaphone

"lasst uns unsere fahne hissen, unserm gegner vor die füße pissen. zeigt ihm, zeigt ihm, wer wir sind!" (let's fly our flag, let's piss in front of our combatants' feet. show them who we are)

"kreuzberg ist scheiße."

"que sera, die deutschen sind wieder da, besoffen wie jedes jahr" (we germans are back again, pissed as every year)

chor chants: "sieg. sieg sieg ist mein name. sieg!" (victory is my name) woman instantly afterwards: "heil! (pause) sollt ihr nach hause kommen!" (heil (pause) you should be on your way home)

rhythmic fireworks, with every one: "heil"

"ich liebe deutsche-land"

...................

how?

blurred

Posted: Friday 20 June 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: , , 0 comments

time went.
left.
sanity got the bigger part.
bigger part went.
left.
right.
sleep got the smaller part.
smaller part went.
left.
me.
where.
me went.
left me.
alone.

charlotte rampling

Posted: Sunday 8 June 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: , 0 comments

hach.
and - i think now i know why i liked vanessa. look:


do i seem obsessed? ...

ladies and gentlemen

Posted: Friday 6 June 2008 | Posted by k | Labels: , , , , 0 comments



jennifer, and i would like to quote myself, "who actually has the body and face and age of a to-be-soon-called-topmodel. she is just the apparently only sane choice an agent would do" - is germany's next topmodel! was she my private and professional favourite from the very first look or was she not? i confess that professionally i would have thought vanessa was superb, too, but she went by her own choice, something i have never really lamented about here. so that's my tears for vanessa who looked so incredibly beautiful ...........
thereby found future profession. i'll go and cast people. that's right. but for everything, not only just modelling.

anyhow, had a gig in magnet last friday. came back home 6. the beer. p out so long. g- wowwowowowowow!! thanks a lot for coming to c?, fe, fs, jg, ??, mb, pk, sk, sk. maybe chance of breakthrough went by. was nice hearing nothing but birds on the way back.

went to table dance bar saturday. came back home 5. the mirrored stage, the pole, the shabbyness, the "mother superior", the cheap drinks, the easyness of getting inside, the copied dollars, the smell, the us army sergeant who asked whether or not i worked there. good to have talked with m about it later that night. and curious about how we're going to present it in the seminar, because, obviously that's why we went, because of foucault.

went to see my father my lord which was shown in the jewish film festival. if that's a word, 'akin-esque' was maybe the camera, i liked the materiality. i also liked the actors partly. it was quite an easy plot and not overly edgy to be honest but it gave some very brutal comments on "religion over everything". some days ago i also saw ushpizin and that was really funny and beautifully tragic and comic. very old testament-esque if that is a word. went for an insightful drink with y. came back home 1.

was tired monday. slept. was angry about myself for falling for fucking mobile company mo****om. never ever go with that company. it is not usually my urge to bash (well, maybe yes) but this time, seriously, they're not what they're telling you.

edited my film eiszeit which will, and i am devastated about other parts of that arrangement, premier july 2nd at a forum of theatre students dealing with time, surprisingly enough.