come and see the time_s

would be too happy to see you there :)

suddenly there was this major flood and climbed my bodies

:)

spent some time painting walls. now it's grey(t).

will have learned in-design through following week and it will be a weak-long-process indeed.

my hand is not numb no more.

i saw the big tummy of the future mummy.

too hot for fluent speech.

untolerable

it's the semi-finals. my neighbourhood, i am sitting here, trying to think, catching the sounds from the downstairs pub that is frequented by nationalist people:


minute 22: they seriously are yelling "die deutschen sind wieder da" (the germans are back) and even worse ... the h-word that went with hitler is chanted.
bloody hell, where do i live ...

minute 37: "hurensohn" (son of a bitch) with the free kick for turkey.

minute 41: emo-löw dissapears for a little while.

minute 44: rolfes is back (after this cut was suturated): "so sehen sieger aus. la la la la la." (winners look like this)

halftime: barbecue and polonnaise supplemented by "SO gehn die DEUTSCHEN, die DEUTSCHEN, die gehn so" (this is how germans walk) and bangers.

minute 46: "deutschland, deutschland, deutschland ist die macht" (germany is the power/force/strength)

minute 50: "hurensohn hurensohn hu hu hu hurensohn"

minute 51: "deutschland deutschland über alles" (germany over everything)

"die leitungen aus basel sind unterbrochen. wir bitten um etwas geduld" (no picture on the screen) -> "deutschland! deutschland! deutschland!"
"ein deutscher musst du sein!" (you have to be a german)
"es gibt einen deutschen meister. deutschland! deutschland! ist die macht!" (there is a german master/champion)
still no picture on the screen. "bildausfall" (no picture) (how hilarious)
just sound.
yelling downstairs.
fireworks.
still no picture (time: 22:06)

picture is there again at 22:07 at least 3 minutes none.

minute 66: "steht auf, wenn ihr deutsche seid ... bleibt stehn, wenn ihr türken hasst." (stand up germans. stand when you hate turks. - can't see inside the pub. maybe they're still standing)

minute 71: bangers

minute 72: "hurensöhne" (sons of bitches) (very creative ...)

22:21 again no picture
"oh no " ... "deutschland, deutschland ist die macht"

22:22 picture

minute 78: second goal germany. bangers. fireworks. yells.
"wir deutschen sind wieder da" (we germans are back)

minute 81: can't understand what they're chanting

minute 84: marching lock-steps "so gehn die deutschen, die deutschen, die gehn so"

minute 85: second goal turkey "hurensohn hurensohn hu hu hu hurensohn"

minute 86: some person ran on the field.

minute 89: third goal germany. yells, fireworks
"deutschland deutschland deutschland"
"deutschland deutschland deutschland ist die macht"

minute 91: "steht auf, wenn ihr deutsche seid"
"hu hu hu hurensohn"

minute 93: fireworks, bangers.
"finale!" ...

"deutschland deutschland ist die macht"
"wir zeigen der welt, wer wir sind" (we show the world who we are)
"raus ihr säcke" "heil heil heil" (piss off assholes)
"deutschland deutschland ist die macht"

they form a circle: very calm and hooded: "so feiern die türken" (this is how the turks celebrate) and yelling, arms up "so feiern die deutschen" (this is how the germans celebrate)

polonnaise on the street to the other pub "so sehn sieger aus" fraternizing with other public viewing crowd (?) back: "so gehn die deutschen, die deutschen, die gehn so"

"ordentlich hintereinander" (walk orderly) through the megaphone

"lasst uns unsere fahne hissen, unserm gegner vor die füße pissen. zeigt ihm, zeigt ihm, wer wir sind!" (let's fly our flag, let's piss in front of our combatants' feet. show them who we are)

"kreuzberg ist scheiße."

"que sera, die deutschen sind wieder da, besoffen wie jedes jahr" (we germans are back again, pissed as every year)

chor chants: "sieg. sieg sieg ist mein name. sieg!" (victory is my name) woman instantly afterwards: "heil! (pause) sollt ihr nach hause kommen!" (heil (pause) you should be on your way home)

rhythmic fireworks, with every one: "heil"

"ich liebe deutsche-land"

...................

how?

blurred

time went.
left.
sanity got the bigger part.
bigger part went.
left.
right.
sleep got the smaller part.
smaller part went.
left.
me.
where.
me went.
left me.
alone.

charlotte rampling

hach.
and - i think now i know why i liked vanessa. look:


do i seem obsessed? ...

ladies and gentlemen

jennifer, and i would like to quote myself, "who actually has the body and face and age of a to-be-soon-called-topmodel. she is just the apparently only sane choice an agent would do" - is germany's next topmodel! was she my private and professional favourite from the very first look or was she not? i confess that professionally i would have thought vanessa was superb, too, but she went by her own choice, something i have never really lamented about here. so that's my tears for vanessa who looked so incredibly beautiful ...........
thereby found future profession. i'll go and cast people. that's right. but for everything, not only just modelling.

anyhow, had a gig in magnet last friday. came back home 6. the beer. p out so long. g- wowwowowowowow!! thanks a lot for coming to c?, fe, fs, jg, ??, mb, pk, sk, sk. maybe chance of breakthrough went by. was nice hearing nothing but birds on the way back.

went to table dance bar saturday. came back home 5. the mirrored stage, the pole, the shabbyness, the "mother superior", the cheap drinks, the easyness of getting inside, the copied dollars, the smell, the us army sergeant who asked whether or not i worked there. good to have talked with m about it later that night. and curious about how we're going to present it in the seminar, because, obviously that's why we went, because of foucault.

went to see my father my lord which was shown in the jewish film festival. if that's a word, 'akin-esque' was maybe the camera, i liked the materiality. i also liked the actors partly. it was quite an easy plot and not overly edgy to be honest but it gave some very brutal comments on "religion over everything". some days ago i also saw ushpizin and that was really funny and beautifully tragic and comic. very old testament-esque if that is a word. went for an insightful drink with y. came back home 1.

was tired monday. slept. was angry about myself for falling for fucking mobile company mo****om. never ever go with that company. it is not usually my urge to bash (well, maybe yes) but this time, seriously, they're not what they're telling you.

edited my film eiszeit which will, and i am devastated about other parts of that arrangement, premier july 2nd at a forum of theatre students dealing with time, surprisingly enough.